Do cats mourn a loss? I met a woman on a shuttle in New York a few years ago. We were on our way to a Cat Writer’s Conference. She told me that her husband had passed away recently at home. She said that the cats who were in the room when it happened seemed to take the loss in their stride—she said that cats understand death and accept it more easily than we do. They were there when it happened and they understood.
But she said their cats who were in the basement at the time of his passing seemed to mourn for a long time. She said they’d walk from room to room as if looking for her husband and they seemed melancholy.
I think most cat people have observed a cat’s reaction to the loss of another pet in the household. While some cats seem to adjust quickly to the loss without missing a beat, others might roam the house and yard calling endlessly for their friend.
As many of you know, we lost our almost 18-year-old Max kitty last week. Left behind are Sophie and Lily. Sophie and Max never connected on an intimate or even friendly level. He had no use for her and she seemed to feel the same.
Lily, on the other hand, seemed to adore Max—look up to him. She followed him around like a puppy. She’d join him on my desk every morning, cozy up to him every afternoon for a nap on the bed. She showed concern when he was sick or when we were administering meds or trimming his claws. And she loved to tease him into playing with her. She loved him, but he only tolerated her.
When Max disappeared from her life last week, she definitely shifted gears. It was as if she
Lily and Sophie
was sad, a little withdrawn, perhaps in mourning. Or was she feeding off of my emotions? I’ve noticed that she’s been avoiding some of her usual daily activities. She sits and stares a lot. I’ve tried to give her more attention–seek her out and talk to her, pet her, and encourage her to play. I’ve introduced a few new toys and games to distract her. For example, she loves small stuffed animals, so I brought home a baby eagle from the Reagan Library over the weekend for her. I’ve also brought back some activities she hasn’t engaged in for a while. Last night I drug out a small quilt and made her a tent on the sofa. That seemed to perk her up.
Lily will be okay. But some cats seem to grieve very deeply and there are steps you can take to help them. Here are a few sites I found that you might find interesting.
Signs of grief in cat http://www.catster.com/kittens/Nine-Signs-of-Grief-in-Cats-146
http://www.manhattancats.com/Articles/Do_Cats_Grieve_for_Other_Cats.htm
http://www.cat-health-detective.com/grieving-cat.html
